The Broken Globe

Patricia Etienne from poetrypoem.com/thetrailofpast
This is the type of short story that I really like "the long short story," which gives detail information and brings the readers inside the story through the authors imagery. I admit, this is a nice piece of writing. I wish the end could have turned around a little differently.
good job my friend keep writing!

I really agree with the previous commenter. This story
seems so real, genuine, authentic, believable. I think
its the style and the masterful use of characterization.
It just feels natural and easy to read, probably because
of the well-written dialog.
It doesnt seem to have much plot, unfortunately.
Its just so smooth. I especially liked the part about
misreading the tone of voice, because the author really
seems to know whats going on.

Really well written, I felt like I was
there and could hear the noise of the
party. However its a shame there is
little or no plot here : The flirting with
the Mexican girl, the brothers girlfriend,
the relationship with the brother and the
mother and his friends problems are never
properly delved into and the story ends up
going nowhere. 3 stars

Very well written although the ending was a bit ubrupt.

How do you know that you have just read a good story? By wishing it had a different ending. Keep it up, my friend.

The writer has a very rare quality of making it sound as real. It could have been better if he had framed the ending to contain some lesson to the reader.A GOOD STORY THOUGH.

Great writing skills, but the story was boring. I was
like, who cares about a couple of idiots getting
blasted?
The dialogue needs work. It didnt help to move the
story forward.

Wow complete waste of everyones time who
read this. So many LARGE details were left out.
@Author please reread youre stories before
uploading them.

Although the dialogue and the sibling relationship rings true - and it is grammatically correct - you still have to wonder, "Why am I reading this?"

Is there a twist I didnt catch?

Any short story should be able to stand on its own. If theres another chapter to be written then the author needs to return to the keyboard and re-work it.

I kept waiting for some climax in this story but I found it boring. I read through it just to see if something interesting would happen and it ended as a waste of my time.

the ending was disappointing, should have carried on, enjoyed the read.

I feel like the author ran out of things to say and just
ended it.

Rewrite the end and it could be
interesting.

i think this really goood soty and iLov3 to buy it were can you get it at