Hobnail
Fannie Poteet sat cross-legged on her Uncle John's front porch; her favorite rag doll clutched under one arm. The late afternoon sun shone through the leaves of the giant oak tree, casting its flickering light on the cabin. This golden motion of light entranced the child and she sat with her face turned upward, as if hypnotized. The steady hum of conversation flowed from inside of the cabin.
"Ellen, I'm sure happy that you came to church with us today. Why don't you spend the night? It's getting awfully late and it will be dark before you make it home."
"I'll be fine Sally," replied Fannie's mother. "Anyhow, you know how Lige is about his supper. I left plenty for him and the boys on the back of the stove, but he'll want Fannie and me home. Besides, he'll want to hear if Sam Bosworth's wife managed to drag him into church."
The laughter that followed her mother's statement broke the child's musings and she stood up, pulled her dress over the protruding petticoat, and stepped inside.
"Get your shawl Fannie. When the sun goes down, it'll get chilly."
As the little girl went to the chair by the fireplace to retrieve her wrap, her uncle came in from the back with a lantern.
"You'll need this Ellen. The wick is new and I've filled it up for you."
"I appreciate it Johnny," Ellen said. "I'll have Lige bring it back when he goes to town next week."
Ellen kissed her younger brother good-bye and hugged Sally gently. Patting her sister-in-law on her swollen belly, she said," I'll be back at the end of the month. Don't be lifting anything heavy. If that queasy feeling keeps bothering you, brew some of that mint tea I left in the kitchen. Lord knows I've never seen a baby keep its mammy so sick as much as this one has. It's a boy for sure."
Upon hearing this, Fannie frowned. She was the youngest in her family, and the only girl. After living with four brothers, she had prayed fervently to God every night for Him to let her aunt have a girl. The only other comfort she had was the pretty rag doll that her mother had made for her. Tucking the doll under her left arm and gathering the shawl with the same hand, she stood waiting patiently. Aunt Sally kissed her lightly on the cheek and squeezed Fannie gently. "If I have a girl, I hope that she will be as sweet as you," her aunt whispered. Uncle John patted her on the head and said, "Bye Punkin. When that old momma cat has her kittens, I'll give you the pick of the litter."
This brought a smile to Fannie's face and swept away the darkening thoughts of boys.
Ellen secured her own shawl about her shoulders and tossing one side around and over again, picked up the lantern, which had already been lit. Taking Fannie's right hand, the pair proceeded on the three-mile trek back home. Heavy rains during the last week had left the dirt road virtually impassable for anyone on foot. Ellen and her daughter would return home the way they had come, by following the railroad track. The track was about one half mile above the road. It wound and wound around the mountains and through the valleys carrying the coal and lumber, which had been harvested from the land. Once on the track, they proceeded in the direction of their own home. Ellen began to tell Fannie about the trains and all of the distant places they went to. The little girl loved hearing her mother's stories of all the big cities far away. She had been to town only a few times and had never traveled outside of Wise County. Fannie remembered her papa talking about his brother Jack.
Uncle Jack had left the county, as well as the state of Virginia. He was in a faraway place called Cuba, fighting for a man called Roosevelt. She wondered what kind of place Cuba was, and if it was anything like home.
The sun's last rays were sinking behind the tree-studded mountains. Shadows rose ominously from the dense woods on both sides of the track. Rustling sounds from the brush caused Fannie to jump, but her mother's soothing voice calmed her fears.
"It's all right Child; just foxes and possums."
A hoot owl's mournful cry floated out of the encroaching darkness and Fannie tightened her grip on her mother's hand.
Finally, night enveloped the landscape, and all that could be seen was the warm glow of the lantern and the shadow of the figures behind it. It was a moonless night, and the faint glow of a few stars faded in between the moving clouds. Fannie tripped over the chunks of gravel scattered between the ties and Ellen realized that her daughter was tired.
"We'll rest awhile child. My guess is that we have less than a mile to go."
Ellen set the lantern down and the weary travelers attempted to get comfortable sitting on the rail.
"Mammy, it's so scary in the dark. Will God watch over us and protect us?"
"Yes, Fannie. Remember what that new young preacher said in church today. The Good Lord is always with you, and when you need His strength, call out His name. Better still, do what I do."
"What's that mammy?"
"Well," Ellen said, stroking her daughter's hair," I sing one of my favorite hymns."
While contemplating her mother's advice, Fannie was distracted by a sound. The sound came from the direction they had traveled from, and the girl's eyes peered into the ink like darkness. It was very faint, but unlike the other noises she had grown used to along the way. The slow methodic sound was someone walking, and coming in their direction.
"Mammy, do you hear that?"
"Hear what child?"
Fannie moved closer to her mother and said, "It's somebody else coming!"
Ellen gave her daughter a comforting hug and replied," You're just imagining things Fannie. We've rested enough. Let's get on home. Your papa will be worried."
Ellen picked up the lantern, took Fannie's hand, and the two resumed their journey. After a while, the sound that had unnerved the little girl began again. This time the steps were more distinct, and definitely closer. The distant ringing of heavy boots echoed in the dark.
"Mammy, I hear it again!"
"Hush child."
Ellen swung the lantern around.
"See, there's nothing there."
Fannie secured the grip on her mother's hand and clutched her rag doll tightly. The hoot owl continued its call in the distance, and the night breeze rustled the leaves in the trees.
"The air sure smells like rain," said Ellen. "The wind is picking up a mite too. We'll be home soon, little girl. Yonder is the last bend."
Fannie found comfort in her mother's voice, but in the darkness behind them, the steps rang louder. It was the sound of boots, heavy hobnail boots.
"Mammy, it's getting closer!"
Ellen swung the lantern around again and said, "Child, there's nothing out there. Tell you what; let's sing "Precious Lord".
Fannie joined in with her mother, but her voice quivered with fear as the heavy steps came closer and closer. She couldn't understand why her mother seemed oblivious to the sound.
Ellen's singing grew louder, and up ahead the warm glow of light from their own home glimmered down the side and through the trees. A dog barking in the distance brought the singing to an abrupt end.
"See child, we're almost home. Tinker will be running up to meet us. Big old Tinker. He's chased mountain lions before. He'll see us safely home."
"Let's hurry then Mammy. Can't you hear? It's closer and I'm scared. Let's run!"
"All right child, but see, I'm telling you there's nothing there."
Ellen made another sweep around with the lantern and as they proceeded she cried out, "Here Tinker! Come on boy!"
The dog raced up the path leading to the track and the two nearly collided with him as they stepped down on the familiar trail to home.
"Ellen, is that you?"
Fannie's heart filled with joy as her father's voice rang out of the darkness.
"Yes Lige. I'm sorry we're so late. I'm afraid I walked a bit fast for this child. She's worn out."
Elijah picked up his daughter and carried her the rest of the way home. Once inside of the cabin, Ellen helped Fannie undress and gently tucked her in bed.
The comforting sounds of her parents' voices drifted from the kitchen. Even the snores of her brothers in the back made her smile and be thankful that she and her mother were safe and sound. Before closing her eyes, her mother's voice rang in her ears.
"Lige, I heard the steps. I didn't want to frighten the child. I kept singing and swinging the lantern around and telling her there was nothing to be afraid of. But Lige, just before we got off the tracks, I turned the lantern around one last time. That's when I saw what was following us. I saw the figure of a man. A man without a head!"
Comments
For an English assignment, I was told to read this story...
For an English assignment, I was told to read this story. Out of all the other ones that Ive read (Keys, Locks and Open Doors, Highwayman etc) Id have to say this one was one of the best. I do think that it wasnt an amazingly scary story, which was disapointing. It wasnt realistic... at all, but not all stories are realistic. over all... I guess it was an okay story. Its probably not one that I would tell people is an awesome story, but i would tell people about it. -grade 8 student, Karen
i loved it1 its agreat shildrens bedtime story thats not..
i loved it1 its agreat shildrens bedtime story thats not overly scary. my daughter loved it, too! thank-you, Crystal!
I thought this was a well written story. The end couldve..
I thought this was a well written story. The end couldve been a bit better though. Here is my ending added to what Crystal wrote... While Fannnie sleeps she is constantly woken up by a loud knocking. She goes down to check what the sound is. When she opens the door she sees the headless man standing there. She screams for her parents , but no one comes. She goes to run away but the headless man grabs her arm. She hears a voice fill the room..saying " And you thought your Mom didnt hear the footsteps."............ I would appreciate feedback on my ending!!!
Crystal, your story is not half as scary as the grammatical..
Crystal, your story is not half as scary as the grammatical errors of the comments that have been posted.
It was a good story, but it didnt have enough horror in it...
It was a good story, but it didnt have enough horror in it. It was good, keep up the good ideas:)
I enjoyed the story, although Ive read better ghost..
I enjoyed the story, although Ive read better ghost stories. The stoyline is good but it needs more drama and less conversation. Im also disappointed with the ending ...
This wasnt scary at all... Ive read better stories, and..
This wasnt scary at all... Ive read better stories, and MUCH better endings.
Great beginning, constructive suspense, but the ending came..
Great beginning, constructive suspense, but the ending came out of nowhere and didnt have as much effect as it might of had had you expanded a little more or made the mothers confession to Elijah more lengthy and in-character.
Very richly written, Crystal. I liked the slow build, the..
Very richly written, Crystal. I liked the slow build, the characters, the details, the mood - but felt a little let down by the abrupt end. I knew something was coming, but a headless man seemed too common for such a nice story. The location alone called for something old timey & super spooky!
its a very good story, it is very descriptive, and it is..
its a very good story, it is very descriptive, and it is filled with suspense. but the ending was a bit rather strange... not because there was a headless man, but because of the way ellen told her husband. she didnt sound so shocked to me.
I thoroughly enjoyed this story, although I admit the..
I thoroughly enjoyed this story, although I admit the ending did let it down slightly. It wasnt the fact that it was a headless man, although cliched this was OK, but the author appeared to try for a shock ending which I dont feel fits the story. Perhaps something as simple as replacing the last "!" with "..." would make it less shocking and more sinister, an indication that this story isnt over yet. It is only that last sentence that lets the story down a little. Overall though, fantastic! Keep it up! Jamie, Folkestone.
the ending was short and quite unsatisfactory and the story..
the ending was short and quite unsatisfactory and the story was a bit long-winded at the start. but overall its ok.
it was a good story up until the ending. you needed to..
it was a good story up until the ending. you needed to have the no-headed man do something besides just having no head
I think this story was scary, but the begining need some..
I think this story was scary, but the begining need some work on it. For example, you should have put something a little mor scary in the begining and a lot more suppence at the end.
A brilliant story! It captured my mind from the start and..
A brilliant story! It captured my mind from the start and the end was excellent! It was well written and the use of words really helped build up that ominous atmoshere.
Very creepy. The story kept me guessing and the ending..
Very creepy. The story kept me guessing and the ending literally gave me chills.
a good story, but the pace needed to be quicker and the..
a good story, but the pace needed to be quicker and the ending needed to be better
dontlikeitdontlikeitdontlikedontlikeit!!!!!!
dontlikeitdontlikeitdontlikedontlikeit!!!!!!
i though this stroy was quite boring to read the end was a..
i though this stroy was quite boring to read the end was a bit unexciting so
AWESOME STORY!!! Crystal Arbogast does a wonderful job..
AWESOME STORY!!! Crystal Arbogast does a wonderful job taking us on a nights walk with Fanny and Ellen. The end was perfect!
I thought the story was really good; quite well constructed..
I thought the story was really good; quite well constructed but too much detail about people who werent vital to the story. I do have to say, however, that the amount of people commenting on this story that cant spell and lack any kind of recognisable grammar is alarming.
James, why dont you just write your own story and lay off..
James, why dont you just write your own story and lay off on swearing on the bible. The bible says not too. :( The story if fine the way it is!
good story
good story
What the ****? Absolute garbage! Badly written and with not..
What the ****? Absolute garbage! Badly written and with not even the most minimal bit of character development or plot. I never thought it was possible to be so angry about wasting so little time reading such a short story. This has got to rate as one of the least entertaining and most badly written things I have ever had the misfortune to read. And that includes graffiti.
Angry? Get a grip. The story is not your cup of tea so get..
Angry? Get a grip. The story is not your cup of tea so get over it. The story flowed well and the author was very descriptive. I could see the charactors as well as the surroundings. I enjoyed reading it and if I didnt, I would just move on. It made for a nice little scary story. You are obviously a disgruntled graffiti reader.
The dialogue was dumb, there was no plot development, and..
The dialogue was dumb, there was no plot development, and it was completely anticlimatic. A headless man was following them. Who cares?
The dialogue was suited to a particular geographical area,..
The dialogue was suited to a particular geographical area, you dolt. Plot: In fiction, the story of a play, novel, romance, or poem, comprising a complication of incidents which are gradually unfolded, sometimes by unexpected means. [1913 Webster] This story has a plot. So, YOU dont care if a headless man is following them? Who cares?
The story was well written and the characters were well..
The story was well written and the characters were well developed but the ending was a bit of a damp squib. I felt that the suspense wasnt built up well enough throughout the story and there wasnt enough reason to identify with the headless ghost at the end. Who was he (Uncle Jack ?) Had he appeared to anyone else before ? Why did he appear ? What had happened to him when he was alive ? Who cares ? Not me...
i thought ms arbogasts story was excellent-i love the..
i thought ms arbogasts story was excellent-i love the family feelings expressed-the characters were good-spooky feelings in the forest-but mother prevailed with her faith and praising God-then that twilight zone comment by the mom at the end of story-well-done!
This was a very good story that had a brilliant twist to..
This was a very good story that had a brilliant twist to the end.
i like dis storie but at the end jimmy dies soo i was bit..
i like dis storie but at the end jimmy dies soo i was bit upset LOL!!!
the beginning was boring. i admit the story was..
the beginning was boring. i admit the story was descriptive, maybe a little too descriptive? you dont need to describe every little unimportant thing, you know. but the sounds, etc. were good. ending? urm...
There did seem to be a lot of useless information,..
There did seem to be a lot of useless information, especially in the first paragraph. For instance, I dont see the point in even bringing up the girls want for a girl cousin, and the talk of the boys. The author seemed to go off on a lot of unnecessary tangents that added no value to the story. Based on the description I was expecting much more of a horror/suspense story, but it did make me curious as to why the mother couldnt, or refused to admit to hearing the footsteps. Im not sure why because I didnt find the ending to be that scary, but I actually did shudder on the last sentence, surprised myself.
I dont see why this story is scary. She heard a few noises..
I dont see why this story is scary. She heard a few noises and that was all. Id say the ending disapointed me
I think the storyline is good but if the ending is supposed..
I think the storyline is good but if the ending is supposed to be dramatic then I think the writer failed miserably. Dont get me wrong I love horror stories but that was one of the worst endings I have ever read.
I consider myself a complete horror fanatic and while the..
I consider myself a complete horror fanatic and while the middle part was tense the first part was dull and the last just plain unimaginative. The middle section was very well written and did have me in a mild suspense but the entire story was spoiled by the ending which ruined any mystery and horror that had been built up. It would have been better to have had the girl fall asleep and end it there or better still as the girl begins to drift off she hears footsteps outside her bedroom window. Unlike other people im not one for a tense story and then happy ending, a horror story in my opinion should end scarier than it had previously been and so I appreciate what the writer was trying to do. It was enjoyable in parts so well done.
I dont know about these guys but I think it was absolute..
I dont know about these guys but I think it was absolute rubbish! Maen sbwriel! Cest nul! The ending was the worst cliff-hanger, Ive ever heard of and nearly all the people who have rated it cannot spell properly!
This was a well written story but the ending left a little..
This was a well written story but the ending left a little to be desired. You have a good command of the English language and are able to describe the surroundings and the characters very well. If the story had ended on a scarrier note the story would have been perfect. One suggestion would be to describe the legend of the headless man and then have the story end with someone coming out of the dark such as the father.
That was an awesome story. You did such a good job. I was..
That was an awesome story. You did such a good job. I was wondering what was going to happen next and who that man was that was following them. Whoa! That was so creepy at the end. The guy didnt have a head. I would have been freaked out if Id have seen that. You made it so realistic. Great job! :)
It was good, but try making taking the starch out of your..
It was good, but try making taking the starch out of your dialogue. Most people dont talk to stiffly, and it makes the characters a bit one-dimensional if they dont have quirks to the way they speak. Also, most people use contractions when they talk, especially commoners such as your characters.
good ending scary!
good ending scary!
the story was great and it was scary!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the story was great and it was scary!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
the story was full of suspense, i like the image of the..
the story was full of suspense, i like the image of the little girl and her mother walking on the rail road tracks, the use of sound was excellant. I didnt like the ending, seems to me there should have been more build up to the actual source of the sounds,that there should have been a relation between the uncle in Cuba and the headless man. or maybe it could have been the ghost of Uncle Jack coming to say goodbye after being torured in some fidel castro dungeon thing.
This story had alot of very good description, but the..
This story had alot of very good description, but the climax lacked sufficient power. The ending more of a bad clifhanger, than a satisfying resolution.
The story creates vivid images and builds up suspense...
The story creates vivid images and builds up suspense. However, the ending is a little too abrupt.
This story was a bit confusing at the beginning of the..
This story was a bit confusing at the beginning of the story, first page, because of the characters. This story had the depth of what was going on at the rail-road track and all the sounds of owls and foxes. I liked the fact that the mother was trying to protect her daughter by making her sing with her to eliminate the sounds of the boots, as she pretended that she didn’t hear anything. Then when the end came to a close, she mentioned what was following her at the moment by looking back and it was a headless man. I thought it was a pretty sweet story.
IO thought it was very weell written, plus a very good..
IO thought it was very weell written, plus a very good story, I could almost feel the little girls fear, and I understand this must have been hard to end, but I must adit it dissapointed me.
I thougt it was a good story but to many unecessary characters.
I thougt it was a good story but to many unecessary characters.
Bit of a slow start but the tension gradually builds up...
Bit of a slow start but the tension gradually builds up. The ending was excellent and well worth the wait. We really enjoyed it.
Amman Valley Year 12
The ending was horrible. The entire story left the reader..
The ending was horrible. The entire story left the reader building with anticipation... then the headless man... what a waste.
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