Contemporary story
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Things We Do Not Want To Hear

She turned around on the bed to avoid the light that came from the window. She embraced the cushion she had set aside during her nap and kicked the sheet until releasing her feet from under it.

"You are awake already." he said, appearing at the door of the bedroom.

"Almost...." she whispered. She could have slept forever.

He came in and sat on the edge of the bed. It squeaked.

"Could you prepare some tea?"

"Please, put the water on and I'll prepare it."

"Bad mood?"

She turned around again towards the light coming from the window. That light reminded her that there was activity out of her bed, out of her house.

"I am tired."

"You took a two hour nap."

She repeated, with a sigh, "I am tired."

He went to the kitchen and she could hear the noise of the water running into the kettle and the sound of a match lighting. Then, he turned on the television and she heard a dialogue in English and the laughter of a studio audience. Soon after, the kettle began to whistle

"The water is ready." he warned.

She stretched on the bed and then sat-up, still clutching the cushion in her arms. The kettle continued whistling. She pressed the cushion strongly against her chest.

"Please, turn that off."

The whistling stopped. Thank heavens, she thought, it was going to drive me crazy. She looked for her slippers under the bed and stood up. She went to the bathroom and washed her face. I should take a shower, she thought. I should take a shower to cry in peace. She walked with heavy steps towards the kitchen. He was watching a sitcom laughing quietly from time to time. She asked:

"What kind of tea?"

"Mint" he answered without looking at her. She poured two cups and sat close to him, fixing her eyes on the screen

"I bought a lottery ticket today."

←2→

"What?" he asked, absentmindedly. She did not answer.

"When is the draw?"

"Tomorrow. Two million."

"But they take a lot out of it for taxes. You don't believe that you are going to win two million, do you?"

He took a sip of tea making a slurping noise. Since when does it bother me that he slurps? she asked herself. At the beginning, she hadn't even noticed it, soon she began to become aware of it and now it bothered her terribly, exasperated her. Poor man, it was not his fault. He had always been making noise when drinking tea. He had being making noise for the past twenty years.

"Please, stop making that noise when you're drinking."

He looked at her for some seconds, surprised and whispered, "You are in a bad mood."

"I am depressed."

He continued watching television. After some minutes, he laughed again echoing the laughs in the studio. Why did it have to be like that? Why do things have to change that much?

"I have been depressed for some days." she reminded him and herself.

 

The sitcom finished. She took the empty cups to the sink. He switched the channel and she sat again next to him. It was a documentary on some place by the sea, a kind of fishermen's town. It is a gorgeous place, she thought. She could live there. It was cold there, people were wearing thick coats and scarves and they were trying to protect themselves from the wind. She would give anything to be walking next to the sea, feeling cold. And later she would have a cup of hot coffee, coffee with cinnamon. Yes, she could live that way. It would be a wood house, like the one she was seeing on the screen, by that sea, and she would have her violin and some scores. On sunny days, she would sit next to the window and play the violin. How long had it been since playing anything at all? Centuries. On cold days she would bake some bread or drink coffee in the kitchen, reading something. She could take the handicraft cups that they had bought in Uruguay with her. Those cups would go well with her new kitchen, the sea and the cold weather. He surely was not going to miss the cups. He had never paid much attention to the objects of the house, except for some records. Perhaps she would take some records with her too, some jazz. He was not going to miss jazz records. But...where was she going to play them? They had only one record player. Television yes, she could take the little one, the one they had in their bedroom. But what would be the point of having a TV set in that place?

He switched the channel again just when they were going to show the wooden pier of that little town. She was about to protest but she realized that she did not have enough energy for that. Instead, she started to examine the kitchen carefully, evaluating each watercolor on the wall, each shelf, the spice box, the plants, the pots. She liked the copper pots. Then she started to think about how the kitchen would look like if she took everything away: the empty nails on the walls with the rectangular traces of dust, the faded-out paint shaping the objects that used to be there and the things rearranged on the shelves. He would die. But nobody dies for that reason, she tried to convince herself. But she felt sadder. He switched the channel again and put-on a soccer game. She lit a cigarette.

"Still depressed?"

←3

She did not answer.

"Then I'd rather not speak to you." he decided, "When you are like this it is better not to talk to you"

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why is it better not to talk to me?" she insisted. He did not answer. She almost begged:

"I want to know why it is better."

"Because you are going to say things that are going to hurt me."

Poor man, she thought. He is scared. At least, that was the most sincere thing they had said to themselves in a long time. She stood up with a sigh, washed the cups and put them on a cloth to dry. Then, she opened the cupboard and checked if there was any flour left.

"Would you like me to make some lemon cookies?"

"Great." he said, smiling.

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Average: 5 (1 vote)

Comments

Submitted by admin on Thu, 03/13/2003 - 08:15

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The story is okay, though its point eludes me. Maybe that is the point. If so, its not a very worth while one. I thought the style was effective, for the most part, though there were some moments of awkward syntax.

Submitted by admin on Fri, 06/06/2003 - 15:00

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I, myself, am in a relationship that does not fully satiate my yearnings. I connected fully and completely with this character, and understand her frustrations. Beautifully written, sadly moving... the author has done a wonderful job.

Submitted by admin on Thu, 03/10/2005 - 07:41

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This story lacked the ability to keep my attention. Hemmingway doesnt really work unless theyre talking about something interesting. I could be talking out of ass (which happens thoroughly and frequently), but I think a story needs to be talking about something common in an extraordinary way or talking about something extraordinary in a common way (or a piece can do both), but neither makes a piece easily forgotten.

Submitted by admin on Sun, 04/17/2005 - 22:19

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This story requires the reader to figure out what it is that the man does not want to hear, the reasons for her depression is obviously him, the way he treats her. However, what is to like about her? She needs more depth for the reader to sympathize with her problem, and therefore be more upset by how she is treated. Communication (or lack thereof) is a great subject matter to treat, but since no one died here, the shallow reader may not take much away from it. Good luck.

Submitted by admin on Wed, 09/14/2005 - 09:40

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I thought this was a nuanced and very believable female character, although I am but a man and have little right to hold an opinion on the matter. It is so true, I think, that a momentary escape, even if only into the private corners of our imagination, can give us strength enough to deal. The title throws me off. Why we? What is it that SHE does not want to hear? It seems on the contrary that she is starved for communication, for the sound of emotion in her husbands voice. I might also suggest you experiment with some craftier language. You can already weave a good story, I figure good diction is the next step.

Submitted by admin on Thu, 12/29/2005 - 22:54

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The title suggests that there would be more to the story. It loses the readers somewhere in the middle.... I like the things that annoy each other... go off on that tangent and I think youll have a better story.

Submitted by admin on Wed, 04/05/2006 - 21:18

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The story was a bit odd.I thinkthat the author could have improved the story if he or she had put in a bit more of a twist or mentioned a past memory of the couple. I also found that there was no real ending, the story jsut draged on

Submitted by admin on Fri, 08/11/2006 - 12:36

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The story only has the beginning of what could have been a great story. But, i have this feeling that the writer left all the important things out, like little details of what he looks like, how he moves. The womans frustration is irrelevant because it is psychotic - if only the sound of his drinking tea irritates her. I dont care if the underlying message is hidden in the story. I dont have all the time in the world to really figure out why she is irritated and unhappy. Simply put, a boring and plain story that could have been ok if a little thought and emotion was put in it

Submitted by admin on Wed, 11/22/2006 - 05:11

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Its all very well trying to be deep, but unless youre particularly skilled then stories where nothing much happens are a huge risk and this just didnt work. What was it she (or he) didnt want to hear? I have no idea. There was no grip there for me.

Submitted by admin on Tue, 02/13/2007 - 14:43

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I really like this story. Its the perfect length; if it had been longer then it would be too boring but it is really interesting. You did good with not putting too much detail in it because it leaves more for us to figure out.

Submitted by admin on Sun, 01/13/2008 - 18:23

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i think this story has no point but on the other hand dose. the author wants the person reading the story to try and think about what is going on and to try and act as one of the character in the story so you can understand more. the problem is the autor doesnt put enough detail in the story to make the reader understand so it gets boaring . the title does not make any sense and the ending doesnt either and the lottery tickets in the story dont mean anything

Submitted by admin on Sun, 01/25/2009 - 17:15

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The woman in the story is has clearly been unappreciated by her husband for years. This has become a way of life. She is depressed because just as she realizes this and hopes for a different life, she realizes that she is stuck in this relationship where she no longer loves this man. That is why the slurping annoys her. The blinders are off. It leaves you hoping that one day shell get the strength to leave bastard.

Submitted by admin on Tue, 04/28/2009 - 16:34

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He doesnt want to hear that she is depressed or why she is depressed- he just hopes it will go aways.
and she doesnt want to hear that he doesnt want to hear about her, she hopes he will pick up and start caring more. They also dont want to hear that there is a problem with their relationship- they are waiting for the other person to change and they dont want to hear that they need to change.

Submitted by admin on Wed, 05/06/2009 - 09:14

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- I really enjoyed reading this story, because it is very challenging for me to see what happens in a relationship between two people.
I would prefer the writer to complete her story because I’m curious to know how the story ends because the wife needs to change her attitude to get along with her husband. Maybe they might be happy together.

monk soulit

Submitted by admin on Sun, 09/06/2009 - 23:25

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Good details: at the beginning, the man sees the woman in bed and instead of offering some kind of consolation he asks her to make some tea FOR HIM (when it´s obvious he has nothing to do but watch tv). Well written.

Submitted by admin on Tue, 03/02/2010 - 00:04

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I like the story,
but it doesnt go anywhere.

The details and descriptin were good :]
but if you take some of them out
it doesnt change the story
therefore
theyre not as needed as what the characters have to say to each other.

Id like to see how this story would end
because one could say that it ended with her
acceting that she will never be able to leave her

but what about him? if he loves her, wouldnt he
have the guts to leave her?

he is afraid, yes
she is afraid, of course

but there has to be some kind of closure
to feel the story complete

otherwise it doesnt go anywhere.

Submitted by admin on Fri, 04/01/2011 - 18:47

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I love the part when she leaves her husband watching
tv. She continues this thought in the kitchen - what
to take to the house she will live without him - to me
this is the ending. She leaves him, escapes the
reality of their strained relationship.

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